There are many colorful characters that frequent CTB, but the ones I love the most are the regulars who continually order strange things or are still overwhelmed by our menu. I have to laugh at the antics of these people and genuinely get a kick out of it. These people are one of the reasons I love my job!
1.) The woman who wants me to scoop her bagel
I get it, I get it. You either want less calories/carbs/fats etc. or you would rather have the sandwich stuffed with more of the goodies inside than the bread. I do it sometimes too when I would rather use a bagel as a way to get hummus to my mouth other than using a spoon. Let me rain on these beliefs. First off, the caloric content of the extra cream cheese that get stuffed in there is actually more than it would be had you had the bread. Secondly, this is a waste of both your money and my time. Pay for the whole bagel and scoop it yourself. Better yet, eat half and take the other half home.
2.) The elder gentleman who wants EXTRA lite cream cheese
I do not understand people who pay for chemically calorically lite products and then want more of it. Just ask for a light amount of regular cream cheese, get a coffee to go with it and enjoy it. Our bagels are good enough to not need too much fixing anyway. Most of our veggies are free anyway and I will gladly give you them in an attempt to help people eat more plants. If you’re really hungry and want a lot of cream cheese, just order regularly because we are instructed to put a lot of cream cheese on anyway. The best idea is actually to get it on the side and let your hunger dictate how much you put on.
3.) The girl who wants tofu scramble on a bagel
Ok, besides the fact that tofu scramble smells horrible when I have to heat it in the microwave, we serve it in a wrap for a reason! It is WAY too crumbly to put on a bagel. If I do manage to pile it on top, when I cut the bagel in half for your sandwich, the scramble explodes out the sides anyway. I really hate serving plates that look like that, but it’s what you asked for. Next time, order a bagel on the side of the tofu scramble and build it yourself at the table. That’s what you end up doing anyway.
4.) The (many) people who want me to read to them all the choices of bagel/cream cheese
The bagel signs are up for a reason. On a busy Sunday we usually run out of multigrain, rosemary salt and long island (our everything bagel). It happens and no I cannot magically make one appear just because you ask at the order taking station. Please do not get mad at me for this and then proceed to name every other bagel we do not have. Read the signs and order accordingly. If your favorite sandwich does not taste the same without the bagel it usually comes on today is the day to branch out and try something new. You’re welcome.
5.) The people who complain that we have too many choices
What would you like? Plain cream cheese on a plain bagel? Who are we? Dunkin’ Donuts?? Of course we have a lot of choices because we like to cater to everyone. Each sandwich is good in it’s own way so do not have an anxiety attack. Whatever you choose will be delicious. Our boards are color coated and look awesome. It’s not my fault if you cannot decide between an egg sandwich or lunch at 11:30AM. Take your time, I get paid to wait on you so relax and enjoy the experience. Better yet, check out the menu online!
What are the people like at your job?